chopsticK~

why am i so retarded??why can i always not find the better to describe my own feelings?haiz...since i've been in london i had so many things and so many ideas on my mind that i dunno how to express out..so it end up i keep on thinking and thinking when i'm alone at home...when i try to argue about something with someone..i get stuck..i mean my brain and i don have enough vocabulary to argue what i wanna argue...so end up i say nothing..and when i go home..sentences and sentences keep flowing out in my brain but i loss the chance to express it...
i dunno..what define a person????how can u show ur idea or ur personality through??would anyone even care..especially ur "boss"..they told you that they wanna hear your thoughts and what you think bout things in the workplace...but i don think so...it'll end up you getting into trouble or something..haiz..this is crazy what am i doing???
i'm suppose to be doing something i would love doing!!!!!what the hell is wrong??
why can't i speak out my mind???i can't stand it anymore... gosh!!!
BTW there is no right or wrong way of holding a chopstick...but there is a correct and incorrect way of holding it...it's a chinese thing ok????
ah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!